All posts tagged family

A Letter to My Mom

Letter writing is a great way to work through some of our past hurts. Sometimes the recipient of the letter doesn’t even have to receive it. It can just be for our own healing. Whether they receive it or not, the key is letting go of an expected outcome and allowing God to work in the process.

Journeys To Mother Love

Reading each of the stories in “Journeys to Mother Love” gave me a glimpse into the lives and pain of eight other women who have allowed Christ to bring healing into their hearts. I love reading stories like these because they impart hope and inspiration that each of us can connect with or apply to our lives.

One of my takeaways was from the story written by Verna Hills Simms, “Take Care of Your Mother.” I was touched by how she writes a letter to her deceased mother every year on her mother’s birthday. I thought it was a wonderful idea, and decided to do the same thing. With the anniversary of my mother’s passing a few weeks ago, I chose to do it in honor of that occasion.

Dear Mom,
It has been two years since the day the Lord took you home to be with Him. I still…

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by ardisanelson on March 5, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Healing & Recovery, Identity, My Spanish Connection, Relationships & Family

Tagged Christianity, family, God, gratitude, heaven, hope, identity, leaving a legacy, letter writing, My Spanish Connection, Pedro Gonzalez Arbona, Rosa, Spain

Posted by ardisanelson on March 5, 2013

https://ardisanelson.com/2013/03/05/a-letter-to-my-mom/

A Tribute to Mom, Part 3 – The Music & the Musician

My mother, JoAnn, loved music and gave me a love for it as well. Neither one of us could read music or play an instrument, but we both had large phonographic record collections (ouch, that dates me). We also love to dance and sing, although I reserve those times for Sunday morning worship (when I can bury my voice in the crowd) or in the privacy of my own home.

When Pedro, the Spanish young man mentioned in “Walking My Mother Home”, started playing the piano in our home, it awakened in me my buried love of the same kinds of music that my mother loved, soundtracks from films such as “The Sound of Music” and “The Sting”, to name a few. Unbeknownst to me, Pedro was interspersing some of his own original piano compositions as well.

Phonograph record & turntable

In January 2011, one month before my mother died, Pedro surprised my family by sending us a video of “Seattle”, a song he wrote and dedicated to us. That was the first I knew of his composing. This led to my taking Pedro into a recording studio for his 18th birthday to produce his first CD, “Introducing Pedro González Arbona“.

Pedro has become quite an accomplished and prolific composer over the past two years. He has composed dozens of songs and his music is now available online. (If you regularly follow my blog, this is not news to you.) What is news though is that Pedro’s music was recently noticed by a Spanish film production company who has hired him to compose a score for a short film.

“Walking My Mother Home” Soundtrack

Since Pedro’s desire is to compose movie scores, it is only natural that he would compose music that goes along with the story between our families. He has composed two beautiful songs, “JoAnn’s Song” and “Ardis’s Song”, which I have made into short videos. The videos (click the links below) compliment my story, “Walking My Mother Home”, published in Journeys to Mother Love.

JoAnn’s Song: The story of the three trips back home to St. Louis to see my mother.
Ardis’s Song: The story of my mother’s funeral ending with my revelations and identity breakthrough.

Pedro rests at the 9-foot Steinway, The Piano Studio, Seattle, July 2011.

Pedro’s music has become an integral part of my life since my mother died two years ago. Not only has he written songs for me and my mother, he has also written tributes to my recently deceased father (Van’s Requiem-click link to listen) and Carmen, his grandmother (Bubu-click link to listen), who passed away a few weeks before my mother.

The Fruit of My Labor

It a tremendous gift to watch this young man’s musical talent bloom and grow. It was fertilized in my home over two years ago. Like investing in Rosa, Pedro’s mother, as we prepared for the passing of our mothers, I also invested in Pedro. Both of these people investments have born great fruit. They have transformed my heart. And now JoAnn and Carmen are dancing to a new beat together in heaven.

Someday Pedro’s music will be on the big screen. I’ll be there to applaud his debut with eyes beaming and tears streaming. Until then, I’m learning to be content in receiving electronic music files of his compositions and partnering with him on his music dreams from 5,300 miles across the world.

If you enjoyed Pedro’s music, please help this aspiring young international artist build an audience and get noticed by clicking the link to like his Facebook page, “Pedro González Arbona”, or share a comment below about his music or the videos.

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by ardisanelson on February 15, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, My Spanish Connection, Pedro's Musical Pursuits, Relationships & Family

Tagged Christianity, family, following your dreams, friendship, gifts, heaven, Journeys to Mother Love, music, My Spanish Connection, Pedro Gonzalez Arbona, piano compositions, Rosa, saying goodbye, Seattle, Spain, The Piano Studio - Seattle

Posted by ardisanelson on February 15, 2013

https://ardisanelson.com/2013/02/15/a-tribute-to-mom-part-3-the-music-the-musician/

A Tribute to Mom, Part 1 – Answering the Call to Write

Today marks the second anniversary of my mother’s passing and with it come the bittersweet memories of the events that led to her death. My healing took a huge step forward the days immediately following her passing. The identity revelations and significance of that healing were painstakingly shared in my mother’s eulogy. (See Part 2 of this series to read more.)

While flying home later that day, the Lord nudged me to start writing about all of these miraculous things. And so my manuscript, “Walking My Mother Home”, published in Journeys to Mother Love, was born that day in my journal on the flight home from St. Louis.

My Mom, circa 1955

Fast forward one year later to January 2012. When my grief was still fresh, I wrote and submitted my manuscript to Cladach Publishing. As a new writer, I had many doubts about my ability to write that piece. Yet I knew when I submitted the manuscript that this story had to be told. I released the outcome of that submission, as I had the timing of my mother’s death the year before.

Confirmation of the Call

The day I received notice from Cladach Publishing that my story was accepted was like a kiss from heaven above and confirmation of the call to write. The timing was perfect, January 30^th—sandwiched between the anniversaries of both Rosa’s and my mother’s passings. It was a gift from God to be able to honor our mothers in this poignant way with the publishing of our story.

I never dreamed any of these things were possible. In fact, as I prepared for my mother’s passing, one of the main things I somewhat selfishly desired was for my life to get back to normal. Earlier this week while in a period of self-care and reflection, it all seemed to hit me, and I let the tears flow. The death of my mother brought nothing close to normalcy in my life. I was radically transformed from the inside out. My family and I have both had to adapt to these changes. Quite honestly, as glamorous as it may seem at times, it hasn’t been easy.

A New Normal

I have accepted that the writing, the speaking, the sharing of my story and my Spanish connection are part of my new normal. It was a gift that I was open to receiving when I released my mother’s life to the Lord two years ago. So I blindly answered the call to write in honor of my mother and in obedience to Him.

My Mom, a silver haired beauty.

I never take for granted that the Lord put all these steps in motion on my journey. He placed the desire to write on my heart many, many years ago. When the timing was right, He gave me a story that would touch the lives of others in similar situations. I have received many comments and feedback on how this story (and the book in general) has touched people’s lives. When the times are rough, that is what I remember most. It reminds me that God is using my pain for His glory.

Whether our stories are publically shared in print or privately amongst friends, our stories of faith are a gift from God. Be ready to share your story of healing, never forget, and watch God redeem it. You never know how He will use it or when.

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by ardisanelson on February 8, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Healing & Recovery, Identity, My Spanish Connection, My Writing Journey, Relationships & Family

Tagged Christianity, Cladach Publishing, family, following your dreams, God, grieving our losses, healing, heaven, Journeys to Mother Love, My Spanish Connection, obedience, Rosa, saying goodbye, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on February 8, 2013

https://ardisanelson.com/2013/02/08/a-tribute-to-mom-part-1-answering-the-call-to-write/

A Friendship Born in Sorrow

My friendship with Rosa has been one of the greatest gifts that I received as I prepared for my mother’s passing two years ago. We will finally meet face to face this summer in Spain.

Journeys To Mother Love

Rosa

As mentioned in my story, “Walking My Mother Home,” during the time I was walking through healing in my relationship with my mother I developed a long-distance friendship with Rosa, who lives in Spain. Rosa’s mother, Carmen, passed away a few weeks before my mother. The connection with Rosa led me, a Protestant, to a Catholic Church to pray on bended knee and release my mother to the Lord. It was at this exact time that Carmen’s funeral was proceeding in Spain.

Rosa’s and my relationship was born out of sorrow, nurtured by prayer, and sealed in love. It was perfectly timed to help me heal the void and loss in my heart caused by never really knowing my mother as a person and not being able to have a relationship with her. Her death brought out a lot of feelings and the Lord has been faithful to heal…

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by ardisanelson on February 7, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Healing & Recovery, My Spanish Connection, Relationships & Family

Tagged Christianity, faithful, family, friendship, God, gratitude, healing, hope, My Spanish Connection, prayer, relationships, Rosa, Spain

Posted by ardisanelson on February 7, 2013

https://ardisanelson.com/2013/02/07/a-friendship-born-in-sorrow/

Expectant Hope, Part 2 – Spain Revealing

I’ve been longing to see Spain and meet Rosa, Pedro’s mother, for over two years. I’ve been filled with expectant hope for this trip of a lifetime. Last April, when a dear friend bought my mother’s wedding ring, securing the funds for my airfare to Spain, my dream became more real. Except for the general time frame of the trip, no concrete plans were set until now.

Making My Plans

On New Year’s Day, I started to research flights and monitor airfares. It has been an overwhelming process for me with lots of decisions. Over the past two and a half years I’ve become accustomed to living in two different time zones, nine hours apart, and communicating across the internet. The difficulty in planning my trip was also compounded by the language barrier. In the end, it became a family affair with Pedro and both of his parents assisting with my arrangements.

I AM GOING TO SPAIN THIS SUMMER! I have my tickets! The reality is finally starting to settle in. So today I am revealing my official countdown to the day Rosa and I meet—June 24^th—in 149 days. Coincidentally my plans became final on January 24^th, exactly five months to the day I will arrive in Spain. June 24^th is also the date that Pedro arrived on his return trip to Seattle two years ago. So the date feels anointed to me.

Counting down the days until I meet Rosa, Pedro’s mother, in Spain, this summer.

The Significance of This Trip

If you’ve been following my blog or read my story in Journeys to Mother Love you know why this trip is so significant to me. The stage was set for this trip when my mother died two years ago—just three short weeks after Rosa’s mother died. As we encouraged each other and prayed for each other during this painful time, our hearts were inexplicably bonded.

My writing started the day of my mother’s funeral. I know it won’t be complete until I meet Rosa face to face, hear her side of the story and how her faith and family got her through it. Rosa has been learning English to facilitate our communication. I’ve been working on the book in preparation for our meeting. It is our gift to each other and a way to honor our mothers.

Over the next few months, I’ll be sharing more about my plans. For now, I can reveal that this is not a typical trip. It is a pilgrimage for me with deep spiritual significance. I will be staying for 5 weeks with Pedro’s family and one week on my own to write. My time will be split between Madrid, in the center of Spain, and Mallorca, one of the Balearic Islands off the coast of Spain, where they have their summer home. It is a dream come true. I am blessed to be able to write about all of this. It is hard work, but it is also a labor of love.

Tears of Joy

Madrid forecast, June 24, 2013, 100% chance of rain showers, concentrated around the airport.

Pedro teases me that the forecast in Madrid on June 24^th will be unseasonably rainy. He is referring to my tears, and those of his mother, as we meet for the first time. I welcome those tears because they are a sign of my love for this family, my devotion to the Lord and the joy that has been restored in my soul. So bring on the rain! I’ll be armed with a box of tissue and an umbrella (just in case).

I am filled with expectant hope of the summer to come. I hope you’ll join me on the journey by following my blog, liking my Facebook page, or investing in my trip by purchasing Journeys to Mother Love through this site.

Viva España and praise the Lord!

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by ardisanelson on January 26, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, My Spanish Connection, My Trip to Spain, My Writing Journey, Relationships & Family

Tagged encouragement, faithful, family, following your dreams, friendship, God, hope, Journeys to Mother Love, My Spanish Connection, Pedro Gonzalez Arbona, plans, Rosa, Seattle, Spain, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on January 26, 2013

https://ardisanelson.com/2013/01/26/expectant-hope-part-2-spain-revealing/

Thanksgiving Beyond America

Ever since working through my 12 steps for my recovery issues eight years ago, I have adopted an attitude of gratitude in my life—not just on Thanksgiving, but every day. One of the things I am most grateful for over the past few years is my relationship with Pedro and his Spanish family. For Thanksgiving (and as a gift for my birthday—also Thanksgiving day), Pedro has agreed to share his Thanksgiving thoughts from the perspective of a Spaniard.

Ardis: When was the first time you came to America and what was your impression?

Pedro & his parents in New York, 2009

Pedro: I came to America for the first time in 2009 for Easter. I went with my parents and some friends to New York, and we all had such a good impression of this country. I could not say why, but we all thought exactly the same thing: Europeans and Americans are different, but we have a lot in common.

Ardis: And then you returned?

Pedro: Yes, that summer I went to L.A. to spend a month learning English. My visit to L.A. confirmed that my first thoughts about America were true. This is why I decided to return the next year, and I had the good luck to meet the Nelson family: Ardis, Curt, Evan and Cameron.

We spent a wonderful month travelling through Washington State, and sharing our cultures in a wonderful process. In the next year, when I returned, they had an amazing present for my 18^th birthday: a recording session in a studio. We shared another wonderful month and we have continued keeping in touch.

Ardis: Yes, thanks to the internet, keeping in touch has been very easy. Why is studying in America or learning English so important to you?

Pedro: Now that the world is globalized, it is required for almost every company to know English. In Spain there are hundreds of international companies which use English as their first language. I’m studying Law and Business Administration, so it is especially important for me to have a good English level. This is why I took English classes since I was 8 years old or studying abroad in Ireland, L.A. or Seattle.

One of the best things about studying abroad is the possibility to immerse yourself in another culture. You have a different experience meeting new people, new places…and when you return home, you start perceiving how different everything is. It is a strange feeling.

Ardis: That sounds exciting Pedro! I can hardly wait to experience that for myself next summer when I visit Spain*. What about life in Spain? Americans hear in the media how bad things are with the economy in Spain and Europe overall. How does that affect you and your daily life?

Pedro: Things are very bad here in Europe. Spain and Greece have the worse economy of all countries in the world. It is believed that we will not fully recover to our 2008, pre-crisis economy, for many years. Fortunately, I live in an area where the crisis’ impact is not very hard. In my family there are 4 people who lost their jobs. So, while I don’t feel the Spanish economic woes in my daily life, I notice its effect in my environment.

Ardis: Does Spain celebrate a similar day of giving thanks?

Pedro: In Spain this day doesn’t exist, but we all know it is good to remember what gifts we have received and their meaning.

Ardis: Now that you have such strong family connections in America, how would you reflect on this American holiday?

Pedro: Thanksgiving Day is a very special day where we have to stop from our daily life and look for what things we are thankful for. When I look back because of the Thanksgiving Day, I cannot say anything but how thankful I am. It makes me realize how lucky I am to be born in a wonderful family, to have the possibility to study what I like, to have met the Nelson family…there is a very long list, so I don´t want to bore the reader. This is why I thank God for giving me this wonderful life around wonderful people. I only can suggest that because of this day, everyone should try to be grateful.

Ardis: Well said, Pedro. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with America!

Pedro & Ardis in the recording studio, July 2011

I hope you enjoyed this interview with a cross-cultural perspective. I know my life has been enriched and expanded by having a relationship with a family 5,300 miles across the globe.

Last year for my birthday, Pedro wrote me a song. I also celebrated my first birthday since my mother passed with friends who have prayed for me on my ‘journey to mother love’. I will leave you with a music video from that day combined with Pedro’s beautiful song, Ardis’s Song (click link). Pedro’s music is just one of the many things I am grateful for.

Happy Birthday to me! Happy Thanksgiving to you!

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever. Psalm 136.1 (NIV)

*I did experience the cultural differences, food, places, and people that Pedro referenced in the summer of 2013. To read about my first-hand experiences in Spain, check out Adjusting to Life in Spain or The Spanish Lifestyle.

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by ardisanelson on November 21, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, My Spanish Connection, Relationships & Family

Tagged 12 step, birthday, family, gratitude, holidays, Journeys to Mother Love, My Spanish Connection, Pedro Gonzalez Arbona, relationships, Seattle

Posted by ardisanelson on November 21, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/11/21/thanksgiving-beyond-america/

The Best Thing I’ve Ever Done | By Linda J. Reed | Guest Post

It was late afternoon and the view was magnificent from my window seat high above Salt Lake City on route to my home in Seattle. The sun was setting, the snow covered the mountains, and the lake was a perfect skating rink below. Out of the silence I heard, “I want you to move to Montana and be with Kelly.” God had spoken.

You see, Kelly is my precious daughter. She had spent many a summer on her aunt and uncle’s ranch in Eastern Montana, and she loved it there. It was a safe, peaceful place for her. As Kelly started high school in Seattle, there were many struggles and troubles, both at school and home. She desperately wanted to move to Montana, and her aunt and uncle graciously accepted her into their home.

Choosing the Hard Road

During 11^th grade, Kelly had her tonsils out and I went to nurse her back to health. It was ripping my heart out. I knew I was missing her life. But, I had a job, and a home, and my friends, and bills, and, and … that’s when God spoke. I debated with Him. My main concern was how I would support us. Sidney is a small town. Where in the world would I work? God is God, and, of course, He had the answer. He dropped into my mind “the school.” “Oh”, I thought, “the school—that’s a great idea.” By the time I landed in Seattle I had decided to give notice at my job of six years, rent my home out, and move. I was going to spend my daughter’s senior year with her in Sidney, Montana!

I won’t pretend that everything was easy, it certainly wasn’t. I had not been mom for the last two years and I surely couldn’t tell her what to do and not do now. But I could be available, available to: live with her in our own place, go to every single Varsity Volleyball game to cheer her on, (even the games that were four hours away in blizzard snow storms), I could be there as a proud parent to take pictures at the Senior Prom, go out to dinner with her, do each other’s hair, laugh at goofy movies, ride horses with her, take pictures, and make every holiday special.

The Fruit of Her Labor

One thing my daughter knew; I loved her. She was more important than my job, my friends, my home, my money, or my comfort.

I did work at the schools. I was a sub almost every day. It didn’t pay a lot, but we got by. We had arguments, and I cried a lot. I found myself grinding my teeth, had heart palpitations, and missed my friends tremendously. But, what I got in return was a relationship with my daughter that will last into eternity. We have a love and a bond that, with God’s grace, will weather any storm. She trusts me, and I believe in her. God redeemed what might have been lost forever. I am so grateful for that still small voice that said “go”, and that I went.

Linda & Kelly on one of their recent travels.

I don’t know what obstacle is holding you back from the relationship God wants you to have with someone you love. But, I do know He wants to redeem it, to restore it, and make it flourish.

I live back in Seattle now, my daughter and I visit each other, we are traveling buddies, and talk often. Saying “yes” to Montana was “the best thing I’ve ever done!”

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Linda Reed is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Professional Coach. Her education, 19 years of experience, and her own healing journey give her empathy, compassion, and insight with her clients. Well-known for her energy and professionalism, Linda’s workshops inspire people with tools that give hope to life. Topics include difficult conversations and setting limits with love. For more information about Linda, check out lindajreed.com or contact her at stepbystepwithlindareed@gmail.com.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Note from Ardis ~ Thank you Linda for sharing your beautiful story of obedience and restoration as you took risks and invested in your daughter. I have been blessed by your walk of faith.

I’m still slowly making progress on my memoir for NaNoWriMo. Don’t miss a surprise guest blogger lined up for Thanksgiving Day!

Celebrating Our Milestones

My definition of family has expanded greatly over the last few years and now includes Pedro’s family, the young man we hosted from Spain in the summer of 2010. My whole world has expanded as a result of participating in the Education First international exchange program. Mostly thanks to Pedro and his mother, Rosa, I’ve learned much about Spain—its culture, food, economy, music, and more.

On top of that, are the simple pleasures in celebrating life’s milestones together—the good and the bad. Since meeting Pedro, we have mourned the loss of both families’ maternal grandmothers and the passing of my father this past summer. We celebrated his high school graduation, the recording and creation of his CD of original piano compositions, and his acceptance at a Spanish university where he studies law and business administration.

When Pedro turned 18 last year, we heard about some of his “coming-of-age” milestones, like legally being able to drink and to vote. He proudly sent a photo displaying his voter certificate as proof that he voted in the Spanish presidential elections last fall.

Pedro’s new car

Last week, Pedro marked another rite of passage—passing his driving exam and getting his driver’s license. This was quite an achievement for him since he took the exam multiple times—a common occurrence in Spain due to the extreme level of difficulty. Pedro sent videos of him and his family picking up his new car at the dealership and driving home. It was an unexpected surprise and a delight to witness this first in his life.

As with so many of Pedro’s milestones, he wrote a song to commemorate it. A year ago he wrote “Drive” (click link to hear the song), in anticipation of his learning to drive. Now that goal is a reality. (“Drive” © 2011 Pedro González Arbona)

Celebrating our milestones via video, photos, music and Skype has certainly connected us, although we are 5,300 miles apart. It is the next best thing to being there.

I enjoy celebrating life’s milestones with my extended family and others who have journeyed this road to wholeness with me. Watching the videos of Pedro’s milestone reminded me of the many blessings I have had in my life since his arrival in our home. Last fall, when I had a significant birthday celebration, Rosa and Pedro joined in via Skype. I wrote about this celebration on the “Journeys to Mother Love” blog.

The physical expansion of my family has expanded my whole world perspective. It has taken me beyond my local sphere of influence to a global sphere of influence—one that will include a monumental trip to Europe next summer. In the meantime, I am continuing to celebrate life’s milestones along the way.

I encourage you to celebrate and commemorate the milestones in your life—no matter how big or small. We can cling to these milestones, along with God’s Word, when times are rough.

Walking My Father Home, Part 2

Journeys To Mother Love

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by ardisanelson on September 17, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Healing & Recovery, Identity, My Writing Journey, Relationships & Family

Tagged family, grieving our losses, healing, Journeys to Mother Love, leaving a legacy, reconciliation, relationships, saying goodbye

Posted by ardisanelson on September 17, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/09/17/631/

Walking My Father Home, Part 1

Having my story, “Walking My Mother Home”, published last month has been such a blessing. Even greater has been the connection of that story to the passing of my father, which led to further healing. Above is Part 1 of the story, “Walking My Father Home”, from the “Journeys to Mother Love” blog (journeystomotherlove.com).

Journeys To Mother Love

My father died at the age of 94, just six weeks before “Journeys to Mother Love” was released. I had hoped he would be able to see the finished book before he passed, but that didn’t happen.

Dad was of the generation that didn’t ever discuss emotions or shower people with compliments. Matters of family were best kept to ourselves. And although he openly shared the stories of his life with anyone in earshot, he definitely didn’t have any desire to have his stories published.

Years before I ever had the thought of becoming a writer, I tried to get my father to document his stories on the computer. I even bought him a book about how to leave a written legacy for our family. He wanted no part of that. Instead he appointed me family historian. I took notes of our conversations and recorded our talks.

His health deteriorated…

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Making Me Bold

All posts tagged family

A Letter to My Mom

A Tribute to Mom, Part 3 – The Music & the Musician

A Tribute to Mom, Part 1 – Answering the Call to Write

A Friendship Born in Sorrow

Expectant Hope, Part 2 – Spain Revealing

Thanksgiving Beyond America

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever. Psalm 136.1 (NIV)

The Best Thing I’ve Ever Done | By Linda J. Reed | Guest Post

Choosing the Hard Road

The Fruit of Her Labor

Celebrating Our Milestones

Walking My Father Home, Part 2

Walking My Father Home, Part 1

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All posts tagged family

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Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever. Psalm 136.1 (NIV)

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Choosing the Hard Road

The Fruit of Her Labor

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WELCOME to my site!

Follow Blog via Email

Recent Posts

Most Popular Topics

What I Write About

Songs Composed by Pedro Gonzalez Arbona

Looking for something inspirational?

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