All posts in category My Writing Journey

Expectant Hope, Part 2 – Spain Revealing

I’ve been longing to see Spain and meet Rosa, Pedro’s mother, for over two years. I’ve been filled with expectant hope for this trip of a lifetime. Last April, when a dear friend bought my mother’s wedding ring, securing the funds for my airfare to Spain, my dream became more real. Except for the general time frame of the trip, no concrete plans were set until now.

Making My Plans

On New Year’s Day, I started to research flights and monitor airfares. It has been an overwhelming process for me with lots of decisions. Over the past two and a half years I’ve become accustomed to living in two different time zones, nine hours apart, and communicating across the internet. The difficulty in planning my trip was also compounded by the language barrier. In the end, it became a family affair with Pedro and both of his parents assisting with my arrangements.

I AM GOING TO SPAIN THIS SUMMER! I have my tickets! The reality is finally starting to settle in. So today I am revealing my official countdown to the day Rosa and I meet—June 24^th—in 149 days. Coincidentally my plans became final on January 24^th, exactly five months to the day I will arrive in Spain. June 24^th is also the date that Pedro arrived on his return trip to Seattle two years ago. So the date feels anointed to me.

Counting down the days until I meet Rosa, Pedro’s mother, in Spain, this summer.

The Significance of This Trip

If you’ve been following my blog or read my story in Journeys to Mother Love you know why this trip is so significant to me. The stage was set for this trip when my mother died two years ago—just three short weeks after Rosa’s mother died. As we encouraged each other and prayed for each other during this painful time, our hearts were inexplicably bonded.

My writing started the day of my mother’s funeral. I know it won’t be complete until I meet Rosa face to face, hear her side of the story and how her faith and family got her through it. Rosa has been learning English to facilitate our communication. I’ve been working on the book in preparation for our meeting. It is our gift to each other and a way to honor our mothers.

Over the next few months, I’ll be sharing more about my plans. For now, I can reveal that this is not a typical trip. It is a pilgrimage for me with deep spiritual significance. I will be staying for 5 weeks with Pedro’s family and one week on my own to write. My time will be split between Madrid, in the center of Spain, and Mallorca, one of the Balearic Islands off the coast of Spain, where they have their summer home. It is a dream come true. I am blessed to be able to write about all of this. It is hard work, but it is also a labor of love.

Tears of Joy

Madrid forecast, June 24, 2013, 100% chance of rain showers, concentrated around the airport.

Pedro teases me that the forecast in Madrid on June 24^th will be unseasonably rainy. He is referring to my tears, and those of his mother, as we meet for the first time. I welcome those tears because they are a sign of my love for this family, my devotion to the Lord and the joy that has been restored in my soul. So bring on the rain! I’ll be armed with a box of tissue and an umbrella (just in case).

I am filled with expectant hope of the summer to come. I hope you’ll join me on the journey by following my blog, liking my Facebook page, or investing in my trip by purchasing Journeys to Mother Love through this site.

Viva España and praise the Lord!

3 Comments

by ardisanelson on January 26, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, My Spanish Connection, My Trip to Spain, My Writing Journey, Relationships & Family

Tagged encouragement, faithful, family, following your dreams, friendship, God, hope, Journeys to Mother Love, My Spanish Connection, Pedro Gonzalez Arbona, plans, Rosa, Seattle, Spain, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on January 26, 2013

https://ardisanelson.com/2013/01/26/expectant-hope-part-2-spain-revealing/

NaNoWriMo Lessons Learned, Part 2 – Personal Takeaways

National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) is over, but my lessons learned will last me a lifetime. Part 1 of this series was about my writing takeaways.

The personal takeaways were gleaned from hours of writing, researching the internet for historical context, reading old family letters, reviewing old photographs, interviewing people (mostly family) and having heart to heart conversations with my stepmother. There were many tears shed during these hours and minutes dedicated to writing my memoir last month. Below are my thoughts on the personal takeaways from my month of literary abandon.

Personal Lessons Learned

I can let go of a desired outcome. When life or professional obstacles surfaced during the month, I had to make decisions that I knew would significantly affect my ability to reach 50,000 words. I chose to let go of the word count goal and the coveted bragging rights that go along with it.
I am not a failure or a quitter. It would’ve been easy to give up when the obstacles started to surface. Instead I was able to keep my focus on the higher purpose of my writing and stick with it.
I’m not doing this for myself. If I was, I would’ve quit. It took an emotional and physical toll on my body, but I kept sensing God’s calling to continue.
I AM doing this for myself. Ok, I know that is a contradiction to #3, but it’s true. As I started to see so many patterns and gain insights along the way, it became very prevalent how important this is to my own healing. It was a gift to myself.
God’s timing is perfect. Ok, I knew that, but this confirmed it—again. There were so many coincidences to things going on in my life now with the past that I knew God wanted me to see them at this very moment in time. (Lots of blog and writing material here.)
God was with me in the past even when I didn’t sense His presence. He didn’t forsake me even though I forsook Him. I knew that too, but got new insights along the way.
I was not alone in the process. I chose to not use the NaNoWriMo online community and instead relied on my friends and their prayers for support. They were there for me.
God has been equipping me to write this story and to serve Him in bigger ways. I can and do trust Him to lead me on my writing journey.
Finishing my memoir is not going to be easy. This is going to take a long time—maybe years—to write, edit, publish, etc. I need to be patient and consistent—like the tortoise, not like the hare.
I learned that I really do love to write—even though my brain was a bit fried at times—especially after my push the last week of the month.
I have a greater sense of gratitude for the transformation that God has worked in me over the years. This past month my writing forced me to face many low periods in my life. I am grateful He has redeemed it and made me whole.

While NaNoWriMo is over, my memoir writing isn’t. I’m taking December off from my memoir, but not from writing. In January I will continue with Chapter 7 and my writing pilgrimage—at a much slower pace. Along the way, I know God will show up and continue to turn my healing into hope.

3 Comments

by ardisanelson on December 7, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Healing & Recovery, Identity, My Writing Journey, Spiritual Growth

Tagged Christianity, feeling defeated, God, gratitude, healing, identity, letting go, memoir writing, perseverance

Posted by ardisanelson on December 7, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/12/07/nanowrimo-lessons-learned-part-2-personal-takeaways/

NaNoWriMo Lessons Learned, Part 1 – Writing Takeaways

30 days and nights of literary abandon is a pretty accurate assessment of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). As a result, November was a total blur to me!

By the end of the day on November 30, I reached my personal writing goals for the month: over 30,000 words (90 pages) on my memoir and getting through 6 tough chapters of personal highs and lows in my life. I also kept up with my other writing and marketing commitments (another 30,000 words), dealt with some pressing family matters and celebrated my birthday. Needless to say, I am thrilled with the result.

I started the month hesitant on what to expect, but knew I needed to get off the fence about my memoir. I started it over a year ago and only wrote a few pages. I needed this deadline to get moving again. My biggest fear was failure. It had nothing to do with the possibility of not hitting the 50,000 word threshold. It was about starting to write and then giving up half-way through the month. I faced that fear and so much more last month.

As a former project manager one of the key meetings we held as a team at the completion of a project was the lessons learned debriefing. It was a valuable tool to bring closure to the team, the project, and to move forward with new insights. My NaNoWriMo project was also full of lessons learned for me—personally and professionally. I’ll start out with the ‘easy’ lessons learned related to writing.

Writing Lessons Learned

I am a writer. Despite my being published earlier this year, I had occasional doubts about my ability to write. Over 30,000 words and six chapters later, I put an end to that thought.
I can discipline myself to write. I set up a schedule to write (or research my memoir) and stuck to it most days. I now have a distraction free space in my home to continue.
Writing takes a lot of work and is a big commitment. No more giving lip service to it. I’m committed to this project.
Writing is a process. I’ve heard that many times over the past year, but didn’t really understand it until this month. (This lesson learned is worthy of an entire blog on its own.) If you are a writer, you know exactly what I mean.
Memoir writing should not be rushed. There are many nuggets and insights to be gleaned from looking at your life. By definition, a memoir is a reflection upon key life experiences that make up the person. When you rush through the writing, it is easy to miss it. I kept a separate journal of my ‘aha’ moments and processed as much as I could, but it was pretty overwhelming.
Memoir writing is not for everyone. It includes a painful process of self-examination. You have to be willing to relive both the good and the bad. You have to reveal your inner struggle and be vulnerable or else readers won’t be able to identify with your story. (Again, not for everyone.)

This month long writing exercise was a great opportunity to jump start my memoir. The result wasn’t necessarily pretty, but it served its purpose for me. Stay tuned for Part 2 to read about the deeper more personal lessons learned while on my NaNoWriMo adventure.

2 Comments

by ardisanelson on December 5, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Identity, My Writing Journey

Tagged fear, feeling defeated, identity, memoir writing, NaNoWriMo, overwhelm, success, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on December 5, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/12/05/nanowrimo-lessons-learned-part-1-writing-takeaways/

Using Our Weaknesses

When I started this month of literary abandon, I was nervous I’d embarrass myself and come nowhere near the 50,000 word count that qualifies a NaNoWriMo participant as a winner. After 11 days, I’ve definitely given up any expectation of writing 50,000 words. But I haven’t given up the quest.

I am being immersed daily in my memoir, even if I’m not physically writing it. My mind is on it. I’m pondering the events of my past. I’m looking for themes in my life and considering which events make the most sense to tie together. I’m listening to recorded interviews, researching historical information online and talking to family who can help me fill in the gaps. It’s been a very interesting and healing process.

Coincidences?

For instance, I don’t think it is a coincidence that I am considering medication for my ADD/ADHD after white-knuckling it for so long. I never would’ve considered taking medication before the healing of my mother wounds. It was too frightening to me. In my mind, it was like admitting I was mentally ill. The stigma was too great.

Times have changed and medicine has advanced tremendously since the time when my mother was given electro convulsive therapy (shock treatment) for her schizophrenia in the 1960s. Taking medication doesn’t mean defeat or that I am crazy. Sometimes it is necessary. I’m finding out how people with schizophrenia and other mental disorders can lead successful careers and make significant contributions to society. In fact, I recently heard that Bill Gates, George Bush and Steve Arterburn have ADD. How’s that for good company?

As I pondered these ‘coincidences’ in my life, I sensed God lay a new memoir title on my heart. It stems from a post I wrote on the “Journeys to Mother Love” blog a few weeks ago, “Emerging from the Cocoon”. Since the first day when I saw the butterfly on the draft book cover, I knew it was the perfect picture to symbolize my emotional and spiritual transformation.

When We Are Weak…He Is Strong

I’ve given my testimony many times at Celebrate Recovery meetings and spoke openly about my healing journey. I’m no stranger to sharing my weaknesses and in fact God’s power is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). However, what brought me to my knees and into recovery over eight years ago had nothing to do with my mother wounds.

I never thought I’d be publicly known or speak about my mother’s mental illness. My shame was too great around it and my fears of my own sanity lied precariously on the edge at times. But now, I know God wants to use the pain of my mother’s mental illness to help others turn healing into hope. My biggest fear in my identity has been removed and is the foundation from which I can openly speak and connect with others. It is the compassion and sensitivity—the transformation of my heart—that leads me to write and pursue more of His amazing grace.

So it is with that sense of gratitude and awe that I am digging into my memoir this month with a new working title, “Emerging from the Cocoon: One Woman’s Struggle to Overcome a Legacy of Mental Illness”. I’m embracing this new season of life and the wonders that God continues to reveal to me as I boldly follow Him.

What’s the theme of your life? Is God calling you to use your weakness for His glory? I’d love to hear your comments.

8 Comments

by ardisanelson on November 13, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Healing & Recovery, Identity, My Writing Journey

Tagged 12 step, ADD/ADHD, Celebrate Recovery, fear, healing, identity, Journeys to Mother Love, leaving a legacy, memoir writing, Steve Arterburn, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on November 13, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/11/13/using-our-weaknesses/

Time Out for a Blog Tour

For the past week I’ve been devoting daily time to working on my memoir as part of the 50,000 word challenge of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). However, a few days ago, I was reminded of my commitment to participate in my publisher’s blog tour for Journeys to Mother Love. Decisions, decisions!

What’s a Blog Tour?

A blog tour is an opportunity for authors to interact with bloggers and readers of their book online. As part of this blog tour, scheduled Nov. 8-12, Journeys to Mother Love is being reviewed by bloggers across the United States. Each of the contributing authors in Journeys to Mother Love has been invited to comment on these blogs and engage the readers. We were also interviewed in advance and our responses have been published on “Journeys to Mother Love” blog. It’s just one of the benefits that the internet can provide authors and readers—ease of access to an audience from anywhere in the world.

Along with the literary responses and communication, Cladach is offering book giveaways. You can enter by “liking” their Facebook page, following the “Journeys to Mother Love” blog or commenting on a blog post or the Facebook blog tour event page. You can also enter (you get 3 entries) by sharing your story on the book blog. (I’ve heard lots of positive responses to this book and how people are connecting to the stories, so dive right in by sharing yours!)

In addition to all that, the Kindle e-book version of Journeys to Mother Love will be free on Amazon.com November 8-10!

Support of my Writing

With this temporary diversion comes the possibility of increased traffic to my website and blog as well as new subscribers. It’s a welcome sacrifice of writing time to invest in my platform and building relationship with others. After all, that is why I felt called to do this in the first place—to share the story of God’s healing power when we step out of our comfort zone and surrender to His will.

So I am diverted for a few days, but will be immersed in my writing again soon. It’s all good. It’s all for God, so I’m ok with that.

I hope you will participate in the blog event over the next several days. Please share this post on Facebook, Twitter or whatever social media sites you regularly use (click an icon below to share). If you download the free e-book, please shoot me an email at info@ardisanelson.com to let me know your thoughts or feedback on “Walking My Mother Home” (Chapter 8). As a bonus to anyone who directly responds to me about the book, I will send links to two music videos based on the story with the music of Pedro González Arbona, the Spanish young man who is also part of the story.

Lastly, if you haven’t already done so, I’d love to add you to the list of people who are interested in following this story or are looking for a place to turn healing into hope. You can subscribe to my blog by adding your email address and clicking the “Follow” button on the upper right hand corner of this page. Or click “Like” to follow my writings on Facebook (upper right).

Thanks for your interest and visiting my blog today. It’s not an accident that you are here. And please do enjoy the literary event sponsored by Cladach Publishing. Click this link for more information about Cladach’s “Fall Book Fling”.

Like, like, like, and hope to connect with you on the tour this week.

2 Comments

by ardisanelson on November 8, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in My Writing Journey

Tagged Cladach Publishing, Journeys to Mother Love, Pedro Gonzalez Arbona, publishing, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on November 8, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/11/08/time-out-for-a-blog-tour/

NaNoWriMo–I’m Diving In!

If someone asked you how long you thought it would take to write a book, how would you answer? Six months? A year? Two years? What would you think if someone told you they were going to write a book in 30 days? Would you think they were crazy?

That’s what I thought a year ago when I first heard of National Novel Writing Month, NaNoWriMo for short. I couldn’t fathom what would motivate a person to do such a thing. Yet one year later, I am registered to participate in this writing free-for-all along with thousands of other writers around the world (9,500 in Seattle alone)!

November 1 kicks off the start of National Novel Writing Month. The tag line on NaNoWriMo.org is “Thirty days and nights of literary abandon”. Abandon means to yield (oneself) without restraint or moderation. That is a scary prospect—to write with that sort of intensity for a month. The goal is to write 50,000 words in 30 days. That averages out to 1,667 words per day.

Why would I decide to take on such a big project at this juncture of my writing career? I need a deadline to get me moving on my next book project. I’ve been so busy with the release of my story in Journeys to Mother Love this year that my memoir has been on hold. (If you follow my story, you know that my trip to Spain next summer is a big piece of the writing. I want to get a skeletal draft of the book done before then.)

Help Along the Way

Thankfully, I will not be alone in this endeavor. There is a huge online community of other “NaNo” writers. Last year there were 256,618 participants and 36,843 crossed the finish line. Finishers get a winner certificate–a hard earned award and coveted milestone on their writing resume. That is a huge accomplishment. Win or “lose”, I’ll be further along on my project than I am now.

NaNoWriMo.org is full of tips and support for this month long undertaking. The main one I have embraced is telling everyone that I am doing this. The theory behind doing so is to motivate us to avoid humiliation if we don’t cross the finish line with 50,000 words. That’s a sobbering thought.

I think more than the possible embarrassment of not completing NaNoWriMo is the regret I would feel for not having tried this. And that brings me to the best piece of advice I’ve found yet; do this for yourself. So that is what I am doing. I will be pouring a labor of love into myself this month. I am searching for the nuggets that need to be called out of my story to share. I am getting in touch with lost parts of my identity. I am writing to share the hope and encouragement that following Jesus brings into the deepest parts of our soul.

Letting Go of All Expectations

So if NaNoWriMo is the vehicle I need to get me off the fence, then I’m all in. I imagine it will turn my life upside down for the next 30 days—including Thanksgiving and my birthday. I’m telling my friends to not expect to see me, but to pray for me. I will need lots of encouragement. (I hear week 2 is especially hard.)

In preparation for this dedicated writing, I have lined up some guest bloggers to fill in for me. These women have all expressed an interest in writing and blogging. They have been a source of encouragement to me along my writing path. I know you will enjoy their stories and what they have to say about how they walk out their faith.

My newest writing prop. All set to write 50,000 words in 30 days.

Other than that I have no idea if I will do an occasional post, do updates on Facebook or just fast from all social media and other possible distractions. I’m trying to let go of all expectations.

Tomorrow, I am taking my next big leap of faith. As I do the words to “Dive”, a song by Steven Curtis Chapman, are running through my mind. Like the song says, “sink or swim, I’m diving in”.

Wish me luck, send me notes of encouragement, or better yet, pray that regardless of how many words I complete over the next 30 days that I stay in touch with the bigger purpose that I believe God is calling me too—and that I do it one day at a time.

5 Comments

by ardisanelson on October 31, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Identity, My Spanish Connection, My Writing Journey

Tagged fear, identity, letting go, memoir writing, NaNoWriMo, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on October 31, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/10/31/nanowrimo-im-diving-in/

Reclaiming the True You

Last year at this time, I attended an all-day workshop developed by Tamara J. Buchan, an author and friend. The material she shared from her book, “Identity Crisis: Reclaim the True You” was so significant to me, I ended up partnering with her on the book marketing team for a short time before she moved to California.

The identity breakthroughs I had at the workshop changed my life. I left the workshop empowered to do the unthinkable—to write a book. Within a few months my short story, “Walking My Mother Home”, was accepted by Cladach Publishing. The book is still a work in progress. You can read about my identity breakthroughs in an interview Tamara wrote on her blog at tamarabuchan.com.

Tamara and I at the book launch for “Identity Crisis: Reclaim the True You”, March 2012

Tamara’s book, “Identity Crisis: Reclaim the True You” takes readers through an identity journey which starts with our true purpose and moves to God’s invitation to become his adopted child in the family of God. Throughout the book, Tamara challenges us to change our minds about our true identity and to not accept the “orphaned” status that we so often cling to in our daily lives.

Each chapter reveals key principles that help to breakdown the internal barriers and lies we believe about ourselves. At the end of each chapter, Tamara provides reflection topics and hands-on experiences that help to integrate the teaching through our minds and into our hearts.

I love how the last chapter reviews key points from the previous chapters. It ties all of the identity roles together and ends with a call to action. When I reviewed the various identities, it was confirmation of how I’ve been walking out my new identity and re-purposed my writing and speaking for Him.

Tamara’s words in the book are not just words on the page. They are an invitation to living life differently—to not remain stuck in our heads or full of doubt. It is an invitation to move forward and live our lives as God designed.

Having worked with and been mentored by Tamara has given me a unique firsthand perspective to witness how Tamara lives her life by these principles. I have seen Tamara cling to her identity no matter what the circumstances might be. In the face of life’s unpleasant and painful circumstances, I too, want to be able to stand tall and still declare my identity in Christ.

I was blessed to be able to attend one of Tamara’s workshops as well as read the book. Earlier this year, Tamara moved from the Seattle area to the San Francisco area. She is a gifted speaker and holds retreats, workshops, and speaking events that revolve around the spiritual truths in her book.

Regardless of where you are on your spiritual journey, as a long time follower of Christ or a new Believer, I highly recommend reading Tamara’s book, “Identity Crisis: Reclaim the True You”. Her book will challenge you to start thinking differently and to break free from the bonds that are holding you back from becoming all that God designed you to be.

7 Comments

by ardisanelson on October 18, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Healing & Recovery, Identity, My Writing Journey, Spiritual Growth

Tagged book review, Cladach Publishing, identity, Identity Crisis:Reclaim the True You, Journeys to Mother Love, publishing, spiritual journey, Tamara J Buchan, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on October 18, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/10/18/reclaiming-the-true-you/

For an Audience of One

I’ve been blogging for over a year now. It’s not such a big feat, but for me it was the next step I needed to take to flex my writing muscle. Just when I think I’m finding my voice and feeling more comfortable with my writing, I find myself getting caught up in what others think or what a blog is “supposed” to look like. Self-doubt can creep in so insidiously.

The truth is that most people don’t follow any hard and fast rules to blogging—unless they want to take their writing seriously. In today’s publishing industry, blogging is a way to prove to potential publishers that you have a “following” or as Michael Hyatt calls it, a “tribe.” A large tribe equates into potential book sales and that motivates a publisher to take note of your manuscript. Of course good writing is also key to getting noticed.

So why am I mentioning this on my blog? It’s because I feel stuck on how to continue blogging. In the months preceding the publishing of my story in “Journeys to Mother Love,” I pursued getting a domain name and developing my website. That was when I realized I needed to brand my name, my image, my site, etc. I hired Athena Dean from Book Jolt, to help with that process.

When Athena asked me what my passion was and what I wanted to write about, my answer was easy. I love hearing and seeing how God transforms lives when people learn to trust Him and embrace deep healing. Evangelism isn’t my gift. It’s facilitating spiritual growth and encouraging people to walk through their pain to the other side of wholeness. So we brainstormed on taglines and came up with “Where Healing Turns to Hope”. (Thank you Athena! That was worth every penny.)

The only problem now is that I am second guessing if my writing is really conveying that message. I love the exchange of deep spiritual insights and sharing struggles at a heart level. I am not embarrassed to share my own painful struggles, doubts or neediness. The question is how much to share on a public blog.

Don’t be tempted by the allure of an audience.

In finding my voice should I deliberately write for affect or strip my spiritual candor to potentially draw a tribe? Should I always write deep introspective posts that align with my branding? “Where Healing Turns to Hope” doesn’t have to imply deep spiritual revelation or intense healing. It’s about being a light in my words and deeds so that others may see Jesus as the author of healing and hope.

My voice is one of thousands of bloggers who have been redeemed and restored to our true identity in Christ—not perfect, but embracing our brokenness and moving forward one day at a time. When I start to question my voice, the size of my tribe, my “likes” on Facebook and such, I am letting my pride get the best of me and going against the heart transformation that Christ has done in me.

In my recent period of questioning and doubting the direction of my blog, the Lord has graciously reminded me that “He is enough for me.” When I look to a tribe for validation of my writing, mistakenly defining that as “fruit”, He gently whispers that “I am the fruit” of His labor. So with that kind of encouragement to continue blogging, I know that I am really blogging for an audience of One—and I’m very grateful for that.

6 Comments

by ardisanelson on October 15, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Faith & Hope, Identity, My Writing Journey, Spiritual Growth

Tagged Athena Dean, Book Jolt, healing, identity, Journeys to Mother Love, letting go, obedience, publishing, struggle, transformation, trusting God, writing

Posted by ardisanelson on October 15, 2012

https://ardisanelson.com/2012/10/15/for-an-audience-of-one/

“Journeys to Mother Love” Book Launch

The last month has been a whirlwind of activities, culminating with the launch of Journeys to Mother Love, Cladach Publishing, at my Open House last weekend. The emotions and the stress have been pretty intense.

Also during this month my son transitioned to a new high school, I began a new treatment plan for my ADHD, covered staff vacancies at my husband’s office, and bid farewell to the ministry leader I’ve served with for the last year. No wonder my body is tired and my mind seems a bit mushy. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that my writing, including this blog, has been on hold.

The Open House and Book Signing was truly magical for me. As odd as it may sound, it reminded me of my father’s memorial service a few months ago. I gave the eulogy and felt wholly unequipped to do so. But somehow God showed up and anointed my words. And that is exactly what happened last weekend too.

I spent hours creating the publicity documents, personally inviting friends and creating audio/visual segments for the program. But when my head hit the pillow in the early morning hours on the day of the event, I didn’t know what I was going to say. I do work well under a deadline, but that was really cutting it short. I prayed and trusted that God was going to make it all work out, and He did!

When I awoke, I felt surprisingly alert, fresh and ready to write the program. My prayers were answered that morning as God seemed to piece it all together in my mind. There was no time to type it up or to practice. I jotted some notes down on paper and made a B-line for the event.

I felt calm and at ease as I shared with everyone the key pieces of this story—interwoven with videos accompanied by Pedro’s original piano compositions. (Pedro González Arbona is my Spanish son who is a key character in the published story.) The response to the event was extremely positive. I felt blessed and affirmed to start on this next season of writing and speaking. I know that these things wouldn’t be possible without the love and encouragement I have received from friends and family along the way. I am very grateful to them.

My mother has been physically gone for almost two years, but as I wrote in “Walking My Mother Home”, I lost her emotionally over forty years ago. I still have a few moments when I get caught up in the loss of never really knowing my mother as a person—like when I see or hear about my friends connecting with their daughters—but the journey I’ve been on to wholeness these past two years has led to such amazing peace and joy in my own identity. And it was with that sense of awe and wonder at how God can turn our healing into hope that I celebrated the launch of Journeys to Mother Love last week.

Since many of you couldn’t attend the Open House, I’m including the video below I created from the event. I think you’ll agree that it was joyful. In time I will share the other videos and soundtrack to the story. Pedro surprised me with the song, “The Launch,” a few days before the event. I hope you enjoy this lovely composition used with the video. Thanks for following me on this journey to wholeness.

Where has God turned your healing into hope? Where has God redeemed your pain and made you whole? I’d love to hear your story or comments on the video.